Shyness can be an attractive feature for a man

As one shy person to another, Thomas Moore tells a young man how to relate to his shyness without having it define who he is. A Beliefnet reader describes himself as a 22-year-old virgin with a busy schedule, who would like to expand his social circle. Thomas Moore's response includes,

"Being shy with women can be a big problem, especially when the shyness is extreme. But as you allude in your letter, shyness can also be a strength. There are many ways of being a strong and interesting person, and being shy rather than outgoing is one of them. We shy people — I include myself in this category — can be great companions. We can love and be attentive and enjoy life. In fact, shyness is often just a way of keeping the lid on a powerful love of life and deep desire for sex and companionship. As always, things are often the opposite of what they appear to be."

Readers are invited to contribute their views.