Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Moore: "... let other people live their own lives"

Thomas Moore writes about envy and jealousy under his post "Be Yourself" and offers steps to respond to these emotions.

Envy and jealousy are difficult to distinguish because the physical sensation in both is so similar. You might think of it this way: with envy, another person has what you don’t have; with jealousy another person has what you feel is yours. As a therapist, I’ve seen lives almost destroyed by both. As a response, I would do the following:
1. Don’t try to get rid of them.
2. Let the pain force some change in attitude.
3. Go broad and deep in the fantasies involved.
4. Track any history that is relevant.
5. Be patient.
6. Notice that in each a person wants to change fate and be in control.
7. Allow greater wills to establish themselves; i.e., acknowledge fate and let other people live their own lives."